You Will Never Stop Murdering Me
Arianna Williams
When I find the girl who murdered me
I am going to dig my sharpened nails into her cheek
I am going to make her bleed
I am going to reach forward with my fangs
And I am going to pause before her neck.
She will raise the knife in self-defense
So I will cling to her shoulder
And I will weep.
When I find the girl who murdered me
I am going to pry open her body to find what makes her heart beat
And I am going to lose my nerve.
She will raise the gun to my head
And she will cradle me and—
It will look like we are lovers… the way we stare—
But she will murder me again.
When I find the girl who murdered me
I am going to bring a basket
I am going to say, “This is for the memories
for you to keep and for me to forget.”
She will bring out the poison
but
I am going to ask her
“This time,
please just carve out my heart,
put it in the basket,
turn it into a clock.”
And she will force the poison down my throat.